Field of Dreams

We here at S.A.F.Y.B.F. are obviously of the opinion that a little nudity between friends can be very therapeutic, but we've just heard from someone who doesn't feel this is a humans-only phenomenon. Judy Fontana of Scarsdale PA writes us to let us know that she's had some interesting results working with members of the bovine community.

"I'm an animal lover and a vegetarian, but I do own a few dairy cows, and it's always on my mind how to make the milking process as innocuous and as productive as possible. One morning it dawned on me what a vulnerable position we were putting our cows in day after day, and I thought, maybe if I showed them that I was willing to be vulnerable, too, it would help them relax and the whole process would be that much easier all around."


Judy also reports that since she instituted this procedure four and a half months ago, average milk yields are up 4.7%. It might not seem like much, but as she says, "For the amount of work I'm doing, it's phenomenal."

Every Day is a Special Occasion

We here at S.A.F.Y.B.F. have not yet formally published our full mission statement. This is somewhat of a disappointment for us -- not that we have forgotten to publish it, it's just that the full statement runs to over 13 pages and wouldn't fit comfortably in the confines of this forum. It's a shame, too, because that is 13 pages of some of the finest prose it has been my privelege to read, and I just couldn't justify posting a truncated version.

I will, however, let you know that the gist of paragraph 37 is to remind us all that the benefit gained by the showing a friend your boobs is completely irrespective of the condition of those boobs. Old or young, big or small, au naturel or bluetooth enabled, the joy is found in sharing the journey, not the destination. Obviously, with that in mind, a little thing like the genders of the boob-shower and boob-showee shouldn't matter in the slightest.

In this case, Mitch Redfield of Three Oaks California is letting it all hang out with his friend Julia Sanderson, and you can tell by the looks on their faces that this is the most fun they'll have all day. Thanks, Mitch, for reminding us that the fairer sex need not have a monopoly on the power of positive flashing.

In the Footsteps of Freud

Our latest submission takes us to the isle of Manhattan, and a brilliantly conceived psychology experiment.

Dr. Irene Mejailovic has spent years researching the effects of performance art, with a special emphasis on how it is received by unsuspecting passers-by (as opposed to the small section of the public who purposely attend gallery presentations of performance art). With the help of an ingenious data collection method, which involves ultra-high speed videography from hidden cameras for surreptitiously measuring physiological responses such as pupil dilation and degree to which the skin flushes, as well as an exhaustive 473 question survey administered to passers-by after the fact, she has advanced her field of study immeasurably. Among her many contributions, the most notable are her conclusions that: 1) When confronted with random incongruous stimuli on the streets of Manhattan, the top three most surprising things are bare breasts third, a troupe of Abe Vigoda impersonators second, and a high-speed video camera operated by a mime at the top, and 2)when confronted by bare breasts, a whopping 98% of people reported no ill effects whatsoever, with 82% reporting that they enjoyed the experience. Granted, this is something that we here at S.A.F.Y.B.F. have believed all along, but it is so rewarding to have the scientific evidence to back it up.

Blessed Are The Peacemakers

This week, we're pleased to relate a story sent to us from one of our international friends:

Salvatore Moretti of Milan Italy sends us this photo and a lovely note. My Italian translation skills are a bit rusty, so unfortunately I can't share the all of the nuances with you, but the gist of it is that lovely Renata DeLuca has spent the past seven weeks devoting her Sunday mornings to removing her shirt and greeting parishioners as they exit their weekly church services. According to Salvatore, the purity and innocence of this gesture never fails to reinforce the Christian spirit in all who witness it. Thank you Renata, you are truly doing the Lord's work.

Like Coffee, Only Healthier

Sheryl Lefebvre of Richmond Virginia sends us this latest picture, along with a lovely story of a charming morning ritual.

Sheryl and her neighbour, Richard Wisenhunt, have been living next door to each other for just over two years, and they have evolved a routine over that time. They would pass each other every morning as they began their respective exercise regimens, with Richard being an avid cyclist and Sheryl being a fan of brisk morning walks. They would offer neighbourly greetings, but not long ago Richard mentioned in passing that he was beginning to have some knee trouble, and it seemed more and more likely that he would have to seriously curtail his morning rides, if not end them all together.

"I felt pretty bad for Richard, because I know how I would feel if I had to give up my walks," Sheryl says. "He's always been such a good neighbour, you know, helping shovel the driveway and taking care of my mail when I'm away, I figured the least I could do was try to give him some extra incentive to keep going."

Richard was a little surprised the next morning when Sheryl didn't start her walk at their customary time, but that was nothing compared to the surprise he got when he got back. Sheryl had decided to change her morning schedule so that she was starting her walk as Richard was getting home, and to give him something to look forward to, she decided to go topless. "It was just such a lovely thing for her to do," Richard says. "I mean, I've always looked forward to seeing Sheryl's big smile every morning, but this is really going the extra mile."

Richard and Sheryl's new routine has been going on for almost a year now, and Richard reports that his knees have never felt better.

Finally, Helpful Traffic Cones

What greater act of altruism can there be, than the one that is undertaken for the benefit of a complete stranger?

It's our custom here at S.A.F.Y.B.F. to laud those who are trying to brighten their friends' days, but in this case, we'll make an exception. Carla Steinbach of North Falls Idaho feels so strongly about the perils of our congested roads that she sends us this picture, saying, "With the serious health risks associated with stress, and how frustrating it can be to be stuck in traffic, the least I can do is try to give people a pleasant distraction and show them my boobs. It's my hope that this small gesture can help cut down on the amount of road rage in the world."

We can only agree. Bravo Carla, the drivers of the world salute you.